Big Girl! |
I had no idea that transitioning Charlotte into being a big girl would be so emotional. I plan to quit breastfeeding soon (but we'll see what happens). Another big step is that we decided to move the baby's crib into her own room. Although she still ends up in our bed halfway through the night, it was still a step towards a little more independence for mom and dad.
Yesterday we broke down her beautiful crib, which has been a permanent fixture in our bedroom for over a year. We moved it to her bedroom, and soon following Charlotte took her afternoon nap. Once it was time for bedtime, she went down with ease. I was able to work and wrote for over three hours uninterrupted. Finally, it was past my bedtime, as usual, so I decided to go to bed. Josh was already asleep, so I decided to go and check on my baby for a minute before I turned in for the night. I stood in Charlotte's doorway for a couple minutes, listening to the sound of her breathing. It was difficult to pull myself away.
I went to my room, only to feel immediately heartbroken. Once I finally laid down, I started crying, as my separation anxiety and fears started to get the best of me. After Josh talked me out of my silly worries, I finally started to relax a little bit . . . And then Charlotte came through crying on the baby monitor. I quickly ran down the hall and grabbed her, putting her in bed next to me . . . I was so relieved!
I'm realizing that in this transition, it's going to be about baby steps, and I think it might be harder for me to change than it is for Charlotte. I don't even want to start thinking about the challenges we're going to face when we quit breastfeeding . . . But I'll save that worry for another time!
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